If you’ve followed my blog for a few years, you may have noticed that I began updating at a furious rate this past spring. Whereas I was previously lucky to get in two entries a week, now I’m usually doing three or four. At the time, I didn’t have a specific goal in mind, I just felt like getting back into blogging. I enjoyed it so much while I was in college, and it felt good to shake that rust off.
But something about blogging as an adult makes it feel like it should be building towards something. What is the ultimate goal? Why do I write anything? One of my goals for 2012 was to get enough notoriety writing about games to be able to get review copies, and I actually achieved it. It took weekly blog updates to F:AT, but it turns out that the more I wrote the easier the next entry became. Now that I’ve been F:AT staff for over a year, I’ve wondered what the next step should be. Should I be trying to push my writing into more venues? Should I be promoting more stuff over on Boardgame Geek? The latter step would probably push a lot of traffic over to my blog if I felt so inclined.
And really, I think there’s a tendency for us to assume that everything points towards a bigger goal. We pursue stuff because there are always bigger and better things to do. So I’ve expended a lot of energy trying to get my writing (not just about games) to a bigger audience. More people have read my stuff, but it hasn’t translated into any hits on this blog. What’s more is that I found my enjoyment of writing beginning to erode. I’m pretty proud of the work I did with the Good Men Project, and I think it was mostly well-received. But I didn’t like the feeling of having a third site on my to-do list, especially when I’m not getting paid for it. It made writing anything, even for the blog or F:AT, feel like a hassle.
Maybe that drive will come back. I feel like I’m good enough to do this for money, so maybe down the line I’ll make another push. But for right now, I’ve been enjoying a strong contentment with just doing this for fun. Sometimes things can be for their own sake, not as an end to something. It’s nice to have that viewpoint right now.